When The Sun Shines

You’ve told me you are unwell
Of where it hurts and how you feel
Of your frustration that the cure is not
Instant awkward to keep heart beat steady
Fear no cure fear stress fear fatigue fear
Steadily growing older in ways that can be more seen
Oh poor baby give your pain to me I’ll take
This into myself trade heated pillows tea only your TV
To view I’ll do the research tedious long hours and
Only the boring chores you don’t want or heavy work I can
Not do I do you call me bossy taking over too slow lazy
Your tangled backwards way of saying thank you
But deep inside in my secret dark I wish times past
You had bothered to offer comfort instead of
Manly resentment of I the extra burden I the petty
Inconvenience your irritation manifest I wished you
To take on tasks benefitting not only yourself
When you were able hale and I destroyed still too late
Why could you not give when it cost was not much
It is good to remember all that you could do and did
My secret wish is remember also what you did not
Are you strong enough to shoulder the cost of
Being self aware that you still do not care I know
Love is not a matter of deserving or even earning
I do not want for you to suffer pain or slow decline
I do not want you to know first hand the hurtful sorrow
Of not cared for but I do oh please forgive me but I do want
You to know remorse and to become aware not from craven fear
But with love from a strong spirit attempting to undo past harm
Why must an old woman’s tears fall when the sun shines
Bear … 03.27.2014
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