The Shut Door

The Shut Door – non fiction

Not so long ago, late October of 2015, in an extremity of exhaustion, … physical and emotional, my little car’s gas gauge even said empty, I went to a close relative’s home to ask to rest there for the night. Before I could ask for help, I was harshly turned away. My loved ones answered the door and yelled at me “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE??? ARE YOU CRAZY???!!!” This was at 8:00 PM.

I sat for a while, looking at the locked house, trying to collect my destroyed self back into my exhausted body from where I had shattered in a silent explosion of despair and grief. I didn’t understand what had happened.

It is true I did not follow proper social protocol and telephone several days ahead to ask if it was OK for me to stop by at a particular time on a prearranged evening. However, the circumstances, that brought me there, had made that courtesy completely impossible. But they didn’t know that. I took some time trying to figure out what had triggered such an extreme negative reaction to my own terrible need, and my joyous happiness, at seeing family after a prolonged (and for me, terribly trying) absence.

I had some water, which I drank. The purity of the mountain well water restored me physically. I am grateful. The personal heartbreak of the shut door has never left me.

My gas tank was empty, but I still had enough money for fuel, so I went to get it, before I continued my journey.

I stopped at a convenience store with poor exterior lighting and the parking lot was surrounded by heavy shrubbery. The clerk was a woman working alone in a “convenience” store. She asked me to stay with her a while, as it was night, well after dark, and she was alone and afraid of some persons hanging around at the edge of the parking lot. I also had noticed them while gassing up.

After the persons had gone. I stayed with her until she expressed relief, and acted, with her body language, as if she felt strong and safe again. She had also made arrangements for some nearby friends to phone her regularly.

Was this event the REAL reason that I was turned away?

Bear — 31December2019
ⓒBearspawprint2019

Hollow Flesh

.
.
His flesh is empty.
His voice is
The Black Wind
Carrying no message.
Behind his eyes
Linger screams
Of children,
Destroyed.
His ears are stoppered
With deceit and lies.
He is death
Clothed in
Platitudes.
He is Hollow Flesh.
.
Agawela 05/19/2019
©Bearspawprint 2019

Requiem — Mozart — Simon Bolivar Symphony Orchestra of Venezuela

 

Requiem — Mozart — Simon Bolivar Symphony Orchestra of Venezuela

Requiem – Mozart KV
Gregory Carreño
Simon Bolivar Symphony Orchestra of Venezuela
Simon Bolivar National Youth Choir of Venezuela
Samia Ibrahim, Soprano
Katiuska Rodriguez, Mezzo-Soprano
Robert Giron, Tenor
Alvaro Carrillo, Bass-Baritone
Gregory Carreño, Conductor
Sala Simón Bolívar, Centro de Acción Social por la Música

language

.

“Language expresses culture.

“The best way to modify, change, or destroy culture is to modify, change, or destroy language.”

Agawela ⓒBearspawprint2017

__________________________________

So many entire languages, and the associated culture, are already gone.

Language is now being used to manipulate culture, rather than culture creating language.

 

LETTER OF WARNING AND GRATITUDE FROM AGAWELA

LETTER OF WARNING AND GRATITUDE FROM AGAWELA

Dear Ones,

I am told that some Indigenous medicine people think we, as a whole, are not in Tribulation. We are in a period of Transition.
______________________________________________________________________________

I have found that change itself is not painful, it is the resistance to change that causes conflict. Especially if those others do not understand what is necessary and are fighting conscious evolution.

Doing without a bad habit is not what is painful, it is the clinging, even addiction, to the bad habit that hurts. Individuals, groups, even masses can be addicted to bad ideas and behaviors. Aggression is a bad behavior habit. The larger the portion of humanity who cling to the nasty old habits, the more difficult achieving global peace can, and will be.
______________________________________________________________________________

However, there are many, including Elders who have suffered greatly in this life and have gazed into the Face of Evil, offer the hope that the basic goodness of humans will tip humanity towards an altruistic future.
______________________________________________________________________________

It is the thought of myself, Agawela, that prophecies are merely warnings, not laws, about what most probably will come to be IF change is not expediently begun, enacted, and carried out.

Prophesies do not always reveal what change is required. That is part of the difficulty of clinging to old bad habits. All addictions, including wrong thinking, conceal TRUTH and the WAY TO PEACE.
______________________________________________________________________________

If those whose desires are stronger towards their addiction for WAR dominate, then I, Agawela, say Tribulation and Apocalypse are the same.
______________________________________________________________________________

Human disasters, that we make ourselves, can be averted, if the causes are dealt with in a timely manner. Those causes are not hidden.
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________

I humbly thank those who are doing, and have done, what they can to preserve, protect, and generate goodness in this world.

I thank, also, those of you who hold the heroes of this world in your hearts.
It is your love, true and from the heart that creates balance against the ugliness. Without your love there would be no hope at all.

Thank you. I thank you all.
Agawela
08.30.2017 ⓒBearspawprint2017

Նրանք վերցրել եմ սիրում

.

Նրանք վերցրել եմ սիրում — Lévon Minassian

They Have Taken The One I  Love

Amen Hayr Sourp

.

Lévon Minassian – Armand Amar – Amen Hayr Sourp – Ամեն Հայր Սուրբ – Songs From A World Apart – Photos by Steve McCurry