.
.
What is that
That is eating me
My own nerves
Chewing through
My skin biting
Going out and
Gouging going in
Dis-aesthesia’s
Tattooed arabesque
.
What is
This darkness
That slides
Down the wall
Wilting flowers
Growing mildew
In my books
All words replaced
With landscapes
Confused with corruption
.
Veiled curtains
Rotting as I watch
Do I truly want
To see beyond
Silvered mirrors
Flake away
Revealing reflected
Shadowed faces
Almost unseen
Uncaring of wild
Tangled hair
.
Unnoticed settling
Heavy in my heart
The weary darkness
Bathes me
In rivers of nettles
My body dances
A jigging cramping reel
Spastic leaps
Escaping from myself
Macabre’ stars
I am not
.
Each half thought
Letter by letter
Dragged heavy
With sticky mud
Unwashed dropped
Just outside
In night again
I am not
.
What is gone
Something
There was
Something
That was here
Just before
I flew through
The missing roof
I was here
Balanced comfortable
On the cross beams
.
I am not
.
My self traded
For muddy letters
Discarded
.
I am gone
My body is hollow
A shell of pain
There is no one here
I am not
.
Shall spring arrive
Draped in black
Bees swarming
Eternal night
Hives empty
Black carpenter
Ants constructing
Termite wars
.
Merely
It is that
I am not
In my place
A fire burns
.
.
Bear … 01.04.2015
ⓒBearspawprint2015
.
.
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bearspawprint 
It’s the scourge of patriarchy.
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You are describing me. xx
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I am so very sorry, Willow.
It is about time for this to all ease up. It’s not something you should have to get used to.
… And I didn’t even mention some of the symptoms that probably bother you the most.
Wish I could greet the morning with Drambuie, now and again. XXXXX
PS
Arabesque is a surface decoration style, not, in this instance, the ballet step.
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Thanks Bear I can see no end in sight, how can those I love the most (well equally as I love my other boys) are at war. As for Arabesque I have heard of the style but I saw the ballet step in my mind, just shows how dumb I am. Hugs Bear.<3
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Not dumb, most people have never even heard of it, at all.
They must be too much alike, underneath. Do the two of them look alike, as well?
Really gentle hugs for you, too. ❤
PS
I think I’ll get out the brandy snifters for that Drambuie.
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I shall join you!!! 😉
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