Who is she writing about? or A reminder about assumptions ….

Just a friendly reminder. Assumptions about people’s personal lives are usually wrong. Please do not assume that references about to with for or anything else have to do with any person in particular. All that I write is generated by my own personal subjective experiences which didn’t all happen today, or even yesterday. And might not even have happened yet! When I write in the first person it is USUALLY myself, but there is a possibility that it might actually be someone else or a composite. I do try to write so that there will be resonation within the reader and recognition on a level that can’t always be acknowledged. I find it wonderfully interesting, and in many cases heart warming, to find out who recognizes what, and what responses are made. There are those who have recognized themselves and their own friends, family, lovers, experiences…. But most folk merely recognize their own bewilderment, or find so many words tedious.

Some of you Dear Ones have come close, very close, to recognizing how I feel, or at have shared how my words evoke your own feelings. Your compassion is humbling, and I thank you. Others have missed entirely and others have even mocked. Well, and then there is spam. Aii Yii. Who knew what would happen when I threw my soul out into space?

Anyway. Please do not assume that any references are about, necessarily, my still living father, his still living wife, my husband to whom I am married, my adult children, my ex-husband to whom I am not married, old friends, acquaintances, sweethearts, lovers, you, me, or anyone specific dead or alive, unless I specifically say so. Dear Son or Dear Husband, for example, will be actual people. But in a poem or narrative or other writing form, relationship designations might possibly be fictional, and, for sure, your interpretation will most likely be fictional or even wrong. That is not your fault, that is how I write, I do try to provide multiple possible meanings. You are welcome to guess, make comments, ask anything you like, and I shall answer as honestly as I comfortably can.

If I say “My Mother” that is, most likely, my Mother. Sometimes I write in first person from her point of view, usually I don’t. She was a complicated, divinely horrible tortured genius who killed herself. Sometimes I combine us, but usually I write subjectively from me. When I generalize it usually from my own self. Most of what I write is entirely selfish to offer myself amusement and/or relief. It is occasionally difficult to only hint at the hysteria behind the absurd.

All that I have signed Bear is by me, entirely, and is my own work and belongs to me alone.
Thank you for all that you have done.

Bear … 02.15.2014
ā“’ Bearspawprint

8 comments on “Who is she writing about? or A reminder about assumptions ….

  1. Deborah says:

    The human condition is such that we always try to connect the dots and explain things with story. It’s how we’re wired. But it’s amazing to me how often people assume that those “stories” they create (especially about others) are not real. It’s one thing to try to support someone who might be expressing some frustration in their lives; another to assume that you can figure out what lies behind it. Personal expression is about sharing who WE are in response to what is going on around us. It’s not about attaching explanations based on faulty assumptions. Great post!


    • Thanks Deborah. Our brains do that with visual and audial gaps as well as information gaps. šŸ™‚ Some folk do tend pick up on the correct clues better than others, while some provide their own clues. That is part of the beauty of writing and reading … they are absolutely interactive. šŸ™‚


      • Deborah says:

        As I read your response, I had another thought. How nice would it be to sometimes try NOT to be interactive? In other words, to read something and just let the “feeling” of it wash over you, rather than giving in to the part of the brain that wants to fill in informational gaps. I think sometimes, we look too hard for explanations and answers, instead of just experiencing things as they are. I guess, for me, I like reading what you write because it always makes me FEEL something, not that I have to understand everything that brought it into being. IF you wanted to give us all the details (I tell the analytical part of my brain), you would do it.

        So, instead of trying to figure things out, I like taking what you offer and reacting on a more emotional level, rather than an analytical one, if that makes sense. For me, what I do notice is that sometimes, my emotional reaction is so powerful, I don’t know how to respond. But that’s ok. It’s better to acknowledge the power of the emotional response than to try to create some “story” about it that will, out of necessity, be totally off base.

        My goodness! I do ramble! šŸ™‚



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